mindfulness made easy

So I’m having a bad day, I want to start being mindful, but my mind is full of reasons why I’m having a bad day, and focusing on negativity is wrong, right?

I try to shift my mindset to a positive one, start making a list of things to be grateful for and find a few as I return to the current ‘aarrggh’ of my reality.

As you can see, mindfulness and I were not comfortable partners for a long time. If we were to take a walk together and I tried to focus on the birds, the trees, the squirrels, the rays of the sun, my mindfulness would leave me and I would find myself back in the rut of what was wrong with my life. My attention was seriously misdirected until I discovered…

Presence

Being present in my mind worked for me. I realized that it wasn’t so much about gratitude or keeping my mind in a good place, it was more about being aware of what was going on in my mind: aware of my thoughts.

Once I discovered this, I began to slow down my reactions to life. Because suddenly I wasn’t trying one thing, it didn’t work, trying another. I was realizing why something wasn’t working and seeing how maybe I could make amends and not throw every idea into a metaphorical bin the minute it didn’t work and give up.

because i was listening to what people said to me and did not conform my response, I became more aware of what were telling me, and that created much better reactions. I could hear that I was being insulted, challenged, questioned, even supported, and seemed to have a lot more time to figure out what that meant to me and how I wanted to react.

This of course leads us to…

Feelings

I realized how I really felt about my life and the people in it. Which he really didn’t want to do even though he was pretending he did, while knowing all along that she’d hate it but say yes anyway. I stopped saying yes anyway, and had time to work out a polite but firm ‘I’d rather eat fried toenails than help you move house,’ delivered without challenge or angst. He even gave me time to follow up with ‘but I’ll show up at the new house with takeout and some drinks if you call me and tell me what time’.

However, that was only a small benefit. Finding out what she honestly felt about life became a good guide to what she wanted and didn’t want to do, try, work, experience and feel. I was better able to control my feelings by being aware of what any given situation was doing to my balance and taking immediate action, rather than walking away muttering “I should have said that…and that…and oh, that would have been a nice put-down!”

As a result of the presence and feelings, I realized that of all the things I can do, writing is what I want to do. I had lost that feeling all those years ago between trying new things, discovering and learning about some unexpected skills, and generally getting sidetracked from opportunities I didn’t want, but didn’t realize I didn’t want to.

My writing perfectly leads to my public speaking, and both clearly lead to the spiritual mentoring I offer. A kind of training with a touch of simplicity and a dose of authenticity, coupled with ‘It’s okay to be you, it’s what you came here to be’. Now let’s make it more fun and empowering!’ Plus some bolt on treats.

I was doing all of those things and more, but I didn’t realize they had to be directed by writing…because that’s how I connect with myself, explore myself and my world through writing.

So how do you feel?

For those of you who haven’t tried mindfulness, it’s important to remember that your heart makes the feeling and sends that feeling to your head to translate it. Therefore, your mindfulness will be more effective if you are aware not only of your feelings, which can be extremely random, but also of your…

Authenticity

We have all kinds of random feelings shooting around our bodies and invading our minds, but once you realize you’re not quite sure what you’re feeling, it’s important to dig into the truth. To separate those random emotional reactions until you find the truth underneath.

A mind filled with anguish and anxious thoughts can often be redirected by emotional simplicity: I want to; I don’t want to; I may want to, but I need to know more; If I don’t try this, my life could be ruined. All messages clear.

Authentically knowing who you are and what you want equates to a great deal of personal power to direct your life in the right way and achieve end results you may not even know you want. I was trying to write a book while genuinely wanting to be a poet again, and getting neither. Now I am writing poetry, the books are coming out perfectly and with much more emotion. Poetry is a wonderful tool for identifying and developing feelings, as well as adding some great insights that you only get by writing from your true feelings. Much more powerful than words thrown on a page by logic.

Is your mind full?

So empty it. Instead of concentrating on your thoughts, focus on what is bothering you, imagine your mind moving down from your head, through your throat and chest, to your heart, then say to both of you “why don’t you chat and tell me the outcome, nice and clearly please” and then relax.

As you practice getting in touch with your authentic truth, it will tell you where to put your mindfulness. Frankly, there’s not much point in resolutely focusing on a butterfly because “it’s a good thing,” while your mind would be better spent observing what’s going on around you, and your heart would be better spent telling your mind how you feel about it, so you can go with whatever it is with joy, or run a mile in the other direction, happily yelling “thanks, but not for me.”

Of Little Acorns

Giant oaks can grow. Dream trees. Experience trees. career trees. romantic trees. The trees of your future.

The kind of mindfulness that empties the mind completely is best done as a meditative practice, where you deliberately take the time to release your emotions and see where your thoughts float by without paying much attention unless they’re spitting out something amazing. Always pay attention to the amazing.

So… we really have three parts here:

• It will be difficult for you to be aware of your life if you do not pay attention to it.

• You must be aware of what you feel, not just what you think.

• Once you have nailed emptying your mind and allowing the universe to send you all your dreams so that you can fulfill the ones you love the most, the next step will be easier.

You will also enjoy a mind full of fantastic thoughts and plans, only dreaming of a great future and not concentrating on irritations at all.

The wrong job will disappear, the wrong friendships will be treated gently, the wrong relationships will be healed or changed, and so on.

It’s amazing the difference between knowing who you are and what you want, and trying to be aware when you don’t.

Have fun; It’s supposed to bring you joy, not a headache because you can’t focus on mindfulness while hating your life and not paying full attention to why.